Call centers: that there is time between calls. That people have time off the phone to form friendships with coworkers.
Handyman: we have sex with clients.
IT: that we can just code anything we want regardless of standards, policies and best practices.
Isn’t that second one just porn?
Edit: actually, nevermind. I’ve seen this in weekly detective shows, but now they make the handymen gay so it’s different somehow.
I work in IT so appearently i can just type override to get into any computer system. Cool…
init=/bin/bash
types three characters on a keyboard I’m in.
Guys… “sudo.” Four characters.
‘sudo’ does nothing on its own. ‘sudo !!’ is where the real fun begins.
sudo unencrypt passwords --cool
sudo rm -rf
in the ye olde days you could
init 1but that’s five characters.
I like the implication that it is possible, we know how to do it, but we’re chivalrous enough to only do it when the plot absolutely requires it
You don’t need a huge wrench when working with the p-trap under the sink and water wont start spraying everywhere either as drains aren’t pressurized.
Sprinklers react to heat, not smoke.
Not all spriklers go off at the same time in most systems. Only the sprikler heads affected by heat.
The water coming out of sprinklers initially isn’t clear but dark, rusty sludge. Sometimes even black as ink.
This is so informative.
And it reeks
Don’t drink the sprinkler water. Got it.
lmao is that Ubuntu?!
BAZINGA!
LAUGH TRACK
My first and only exposure to that god-awful show as a small snipped my GF at the time insisted I watch.
“I’m playing games. On an… emulator”
11 SECONDS OF WILD LAUGHTER
I’m actually pleasantly surprised by how much movies get right with rowing and sailing in movies.
The one that does make me roll my eyes is the scenes where characters are chilling in the galley or bed and then suddenly run up because they hear/see a problem through a porthole. I always get pretty grumpy with the idea of folks being actively under sail and simply ‘tying’ the wheel or tiller and going under the deck. Only the incredibly expensive sailboats can truly get away with that. A small, affordable to a middle class type, yacht will have that with a motor, but sails are not so forgiving. If the wind changes you could have a pretty bad day, and even a perfectly ‘straight’ tiller will likely have you turning circles ere long. That’s not even considering how poor of a decision that would be unless you were a military ship in the middle of the ocean and others would get out of your way. Just because collisions are super de duper unlikely doesn’t mean they’re impossible.
Rowing and sailing they get right because they are upper middle class activities, form which screenwriters are almost exclusively picked
I constantly get surprised looks from the people I deal with when they learn I don’t know anything about sailing.
Sailing, maybe, but rowing doesn’t have to be upper middle class. I’m solidly lower middle class, if that, and I get by. With the club, it’s about the same as a gym membership subscription at the end of the day.
Still in the ‘acceptable in a polo at the lawn party’ crowd
That said, if someone told you “I was on the rowing team back at university” you’d have decent odds his name would be Chet or similar.
I almost never see accurate sword fights. If they last more than two or three swings, they’re likely wrong. And Achilles jumping at the beginning of Troy was just comical. Footwork is so vital to sword play that leaving the ground is insane. But realistic sword play would be boring as fuck. It would be over in half a second and you would barely see any movement.
It never occurred to me that cinematic/theatrical sword fights are to swordsmanship what gun-fu is to marksmanship lol
that really is a great way to sum it up.
Funny to think a John Woo film could make both marksmen and sword practitioners wince for different parts while cheering for the other
The ‘but I am not left handed’ duel in The Princess Bride is about as close as can be expected
And Achilles jumping at the beginning of Troy was just comical.
FUCKING THANK YOU I HAVE BEEN THINKING THAT FOR DECADES
That’s Bob Anderson’s masterpiece. Greatest film sword stuntman and choreographer ever, Darth Vader himself. Although I would say that the best film depictions of sword fighting have to be Alatriste for rapier fencing and Rob Roy (1995) for the broadsword. The Last Duel was also both entertaining and realistic.
TIL and thank you for pointing me to movies I’ve never seen.
Reminds me of the old days of the internet when people still talked about niche things they loved without judgment. If any gods exist may all of them richly bless you with exactly as many pleasant surprises as you desire.
About anything to do with computers. Anything.
Nods and waves arms widely - the computers.
Which ones? All of them.
Even worse the Hollywood Effect makes the stuff that I do that’s ACTUALLY impressive look like routine.
Fuckers will literally clap if I unjam their printer but manually recalculate a CRC header for a mission critical live database without a second of downtime and they’re like ‘Ok but isn’t that your job?’
BITCH LESS THAN 5 PEOPLE IN THE STATE CAN DO THIS
But you just typed in some numbers
BITCH I CANNOT EXPLAIN IN UNDER FOUR HOURS HOW TO FIGURE OUT THE RIGHT NUMBERS TO USE
import crc
import crc
Ok, so how do you calculate the correct value when the database keeps dumping new arbitrary length records at roughly 10 per second? And figure it out quick because once that record hits finalization in roughly four minutes, it’s going to puke out a record dump that contains every test done since the database was stood up a decade ago and there isn’t enough HD space in the cluster for even half of it.
Three minutes now, do you have that number? Two minutes fifty seconds…
The more complex the task, the less fucking impressed the proles are.
It angers me even more than normal that this is so fucking true
currently rescuing 7tb off a corrupted stripe. My boss does not seem to grasp what Big Deal this is. Ima bout to dig up recovery pricing to slap him with
That’s a smart way to do it, can’t argue with an accepted price
actually his response was “eh, if we didn’t have you we’d just tell the customers we lost the data”
I want to skin him and wear him as a hat.
I wish I could hack into infrastructure in real time.
- My car doesn’t have a cigarette lighter
- My fridge has food in it
- There is/isn’t a guy named Ivan at work
I don’t think I’ve ever seen blacksmithing done correctly in a movie, show or game.
Accountants actually spend hardly any time doing tax work. And in most countries tax returns are automatic anyway, so no, AI isn’t going to destroy all the accountant jobs.
I started IT thinking it was genuinely telling people to turn their computers off and on again. I feel that’s like a 1% though. Most of the times it’s actual issues. At my work some stuff is hardware, web, databases and I wasn’t expecting this when I first started.
Thanks IT Crowd
They have a good gig in that show, tucked away in the basement, virtually no work to do, no deadlines, no kanban…
Retail workers spending the day doing shenanigans while barely doing any work, I’d kill for time to do some stupid time wasting shit.
Sorry I can’t join your impromptu wedding for two workers whose name I forgot.
LOL or for that matter fictional characters doing ANY job. It’s like they just screw around all day having wacky misadventures and somehow the company stays in business.
Right? I dunno how it was back in the old days but Clerks is maybe the worst representation of modern service workers I’ve ever seen. I’ve got a “hard labor” job and work about 1/4th as hard doing that than I ever did in service when I was younger
Superstore is the worst representation of retail work, I think they did about a week’s worth of work max during the entire series.
One of the better ones is a British show called Trolled, they at least show them doing some form of actual retail work, still shenanigans, but they never leave the store to do them besides one or 2 episodes, plus it’s a damn good comedy.
We almost never uncover accursed tomes or massive government conspiracies.
(Archivist)
almost
Hmm
I don’t think I’ve ever seen my job in a movie. The only place I could imagine industrial embroidery ever showing up on screen would be as the setting for a chase scene or something.
I wanna see the flight scene in one of those shops now where someone gets embroidered during the fight.
I also work with industrial embroidery machines (not directly, we just have them at work) so I know the like 10 seconds under a needle wouldn’t be enough time to do anything really, but I’m imagining a room full of machines making military name strips, hero blocks a goons punch and shoves his hand under a needle while the goon yells in agony. Camera focuses on how horrified face as he lifts his hand to reveal “Maj. Payne” embroidered across his hand. The goon then faints.
Now you’re making me want to write a story about a high stakes embroidery counterfeiting ring
