Cloaca-cola, as envisioned by Pininfarina!
Cloacamaster orificeCloaca-Cola
There it is. That should have been the post title.
You can edit titles on Lemmy
It’s too late now. OP must commit ritual suicide by mixing all the flavors
Basically what this was:
This looks like it’s from Postal 2.
Only tastes ok
A joke from Kingdom of Loathing.
Soda fountain(ancient)
Soda machine(old)
Cloaca-Cola dispenser (current)
The Cloca-Cola ™ UIXperience (soon)
Counter argument: Vanilla Coke
Second counter argument: peach sprite
Or like 3 different nonstandard fruit flavored sprites. At once
Do you not have those syrup things? Pretty much every gas station has one.
Plastic pumps separate from the fountain? I’ve seen them once or twice but I couldn’t name a chain that I’ve been to which has those. But also you’d have to know the ideal ratio of syrup to base soda rather than have it pre-mixed.
Very few restaurants have them (especially those without bars), and the ones that do never clean the pump head so it’s always covered in dirt and bacteria. At least I know that the soda fountain nozzle(s) gets cleaned nightly at most restaurants. But nobody ever seems to sanitize the flavor pumps.
Yeah, I don’t think I’ve seen them at restaurants, but I have seen them at convenience stores a ton. Why they didn’t have the flavor shots has always confused me, because that has been the difference between me getting a soda and not.
Also being able to get anything in diet instead of just one or two things.
I have one of those Coke machines on top in my man cave. The root beer stains like crazy. If you run coke through the root beer spout, it will taste like coke with root beer flavor regardless how much you clean or purge the system.
I just want water man
Water fucking rules, man.
…well? What are the rules?
Here you go. List formatting added:
- “Be like water making its way through cracks.
- Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it.
- If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves.
- Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water.
- If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash.
- Be water, my friend.”
― Bruce Lee
- The first rule of Water Club is that you always talk about Water Club.
- The second rule of Water Club is that you always talk about Water Club.
- If someone is sweaty or peeing yellow, the fight against their thirst is on.
- Only two cups of water (is not nearly enough)
- One cup of water at a time is plenty, but you should drink more
- No shirt, no shoes. Don’t want to get those wet.
- Drinking will continue for as long as the subject is not properly hydrated.
- If this is your first glass of water today, you have to drink it.
water man
You can use the term “Aqua Man” to sound fancier.
Nah, that’s different. Water man is the grown up version of the water boy.
Is it bad that I saw that movie in the theater, but without your link I would have never pieced that together?
Eh, that’s just called getting old. Sorry for your loss.
Aqua Homo if ya want to be extra Latin.
And the water always tastes like shit out of these because they don’t clean the tip. On the old style it was always sharing lemonade or Powerade and you could just run the line for a second or two to clear it
Do what I do, and let some water run down the drain to clear the nozzle first before you fill your cup. It only takes an extra second.
I literally said that, but I was implying it doesn’t often work with those all-in-one machines
Sorry I have ADHD. Didn’t finish reading before I commented.
It’s also annoying to use, slower and can’t serve multiple people at the same time.
The machines used to be relatively fast. But over time they’ve gotten slower and slower to the point it takes multiple seconds to respond to a touch.
Where I am, they had popped up all over the place at first but have mostly disappeared since then and the ones that remain barely have any flavour customizations anymore.
My guess would be that they came with predatory subscription fees or some shit like that that resulted in them costing more than they brought in and most businesses cancelled their subscription or downgraded to the basic version that just acts as a shitty version of the old style.
Either that or they are difficult to keep clean and result in a lot of flavour syrup going to waste when the less popular flavours expire. Or a combination of the two, maybe with HP-style machine-enforced expiry dates on the syrups that are tuned for profit rather than safety/quality.
They’re apparently massive pieces of shit and very unreliable. But that makes sense for a product with a Pininfarina product. (yes I know they do the outsides of products not the insides)
I think the extra annoyance is counteracted by the gains in customizability IMO
Where else are you going to be able to get Peach Sprite or Vanilla Fanta?
Almost any gas station has those syrup pumps, and here in Utah, we have a soda shop (like Swig) on almost every corner.
It’s because of mormons! I’ve seen it on the YouTube!
That’s actually more true than not. These soda shops are essentially an alternative to coffee shops for those who believe drinking coffee and tea are bad. It’s the same caffeine fix, but without being coffee or tea.
Now I’m wondering what the Mormon position on GamerSupps is?
Not sure if joke about waifus or legitimate question about energy drinks…
Would you believe me if I said it was both?
I thought tea was illegal in Utah.
No, and soda isn’t tea anyway. Not sure what you’re getting at.
deleted by creator
Ah, lol. 🤦
Tea being illegal in Utah.
You’re thinking of magnets
This is very much a Utah thing. Specifically because of Mormons. Do you think every other state is like that?
Most gas stations definitely do not have syrup pumps.
Or diet everything.
The self serve suck for high volume but personally I hate when people butt in while I’m getting a drink. Wendy’s seems to do a pretty good job but they are Crew serve units(for drive through) upside is more than eight flavors.
Aren’t those the ones made to collect data from users with a camera?
So, NOT great at an orgy.
I like them, but I’m always behind someone who looks like they’ve never used technology more advanced than a telegraph before
The only reason why I like them is because I can cherry all the things. Cherry Coke, Cherry Sprite, Cherry root beer… You get the idea.
(I also like that cherry lime drink that several restaurants advertise under different names as their “exclusive” beverage. On the top of my head I know that Jack in the Box and Firehouse Subs both have it, with their own branding slapped on the name.)
That’s the reason I originally thought they were cool, however, in practice, they almost never allowed you to mix anything with anything, and it was purely a limit placed in the software. I couldn’t cherry anything but coke and dr pepper on any of them I ever used. I couldn’t add lemon to anything but the already raspberry flavored Fuze tea. I couldn’t add vanilla to the root beer or have grape flavored sprite. Shit pisses me off, because it wasn’t that they didn’t have a certain flavor, the interface just didn’t show the flavors available for every possible soda on the machine. Especially when I would see people elsewhere with them setup in the way you really want, where you could cherry everything. 😬
Yeah, we had two of these replace the old school style drink stations at the hospital I work at. They had to bring back one of the old machines because the new machines were causing so much congestion in the cafeteria. Pretty sure the hardware in these predate blackberrys, they take forever to recognize any input from the screen.
Plus if you are just trying to get water, it gets slightly contaminated from whatever beverage the last person got. Especially if it’s blue powerade for some reason.
why are you getting plain water from the soda machine when there HAVE to be semi-decent water fountains in a hospital? the powerade splashed water is on you at that point.
Water fountains aren’t usually positioned as part of a cafeteria line. They are also slower and have weird angles, not always being convenient to fill up a cup from.
My hospital doesn’t really have very many water fountains. I think there may be one near the public restrooms on the main floors, but I think that’s it. We have a water cooler in my clinic’s break room, but no water fountains near the cafeteria.
I work for a state run hospital in one of the poorer states in the nation. We don’t have a lot of amenities… And unfortunately not a lot of people drink water here.
Especially if it’s blue powerade for
That’s amusing, because it always seemed like blue powerade was the default nozzle for the ‘water’ option at the other style of machine, so it was getting that contamination there as well.
Who doesn’t like Caribbean blue drinking water?
Unlike my ex wife
These things are not new…
All of that is unholy because the Coca Cola company is pure shit.
Was this explanation accurate?
It gets worse. They hired hitmen to kill trade union leaders in Colombia.
I don’t care what it comes out of as long as the machine is properly and regularly cleaned.
I am afraid your out of luck either way.
I have been straight up poisoned several times by improperly maintained soda fountains. I avoid them now.
❤️cloacas❤️
Lime coke from those machines is delicious. Fight me.
I like to make something new each time. Might try this next time.
Only a might try? Bro can’t even let himself imagine me flavors.
Ginger lime diet coke is an abomination and I’m here for it.
That’s rich coming from the “why not cum from where we pee?” Species
You say that like we’re the only species who do that, which very much isn’t the case.
If breathing and eating don’t get separate holes, piss and cum certainly aren’t getting that luxury
At least in males they aren’t getting that luxury.
females don’t pee
Right, because pee is stored in the balls
…do I want to search up what a cloaca is?
Do it. Knowledge is power.
It’s one of those words where whatever you first think of when hearing it, is probably fairly close to the real thing
Even if you know what it is, it may surprise you that more that one species can breathe out of it.
Even humans can absorb oxygen through the intestines
You do not.
Ok thank you.
Legendary exchange
I feel like the context of “the opposite of 1 hole per beverage” gives a good vague explanation. Another is “how I pictured women’s anatomy before I took a health class.”
It’s the omni-genital.
The Wikipedia article describes the biological act of a “cloaca kiss,” which may or may not be exactly what it sounds like depending on an individual’s imagination.
What the hell!?
I clicked the comments just to share my fun “cloacal kiss” fact!
Ugh. I’m going back to reddit.
Why are you making me look this up?
Damn you sir or madam.
Wound up looking at a page of animal dongs.
Amazing
As long as you’re not studying biology, you get a pass on this one.
