Somewhat related: that’s a dream blunt rotation right there
I feel like Gimli would hog it, Aragorn would obviously be awesome, and Legolas would be chill but you could tell he’s thinking your weed sucks, he’s got a much better connection.
i like to imagine that weed is the opposite of beer when it comes to elves and dwarves, elves barely even notice while dwarves start giggling when standing next to someone puffing a blunt
Gimli, it’s a blunt, not a microphone
I’d also go for Data, Riker, and LaForge.
Ehhh debatable if Data is a “man”, and LaForge… well, he wouldn’t be on my list. My picks from TNG to share a turbolift would would be Picard, O’Brien and Riker. Picard would be either ruminating on some deep crisis or current drama and be quiet and majestic. O’Brien would be preoccupied and anxious about some project and trying to build up the courage to talk to the senior officers about it. Riker would be relaxed, polite and crack a joke that would make you chuckle.
If counting non-human male characters across ST, then Data, Odo and Spock.
I mean… No Worf? I feel like he’d be the safest choice together with Data
Eh, he can have a temper, I know it doesn’t necessarily come up day to day but when he’s pissed he doesn’t always contain his anger. He’s safer than a lot of people but no he doesn’t make my top three. My runner up for top three male non-humans was actually Garak.
He’s a cutie! What temper?
Cheery Littlebottom?
non-zero chance Riker tries to flirt with you
Sure but he would handle rejection well and laugh it off if so. Riker, afaicr, respected signals and consent. He flirted with people who seemed open to it and was perfectly professional to those who weren’t.
I’ll choose chaos. Picard, Riker, and Q.
I feel like you’d have more chaos with Picard, Martok, and Q
Mariner, Martok, and Q
I said chaos, not Galaxy wide devastation
Luke, Han, and R2D2.
That’s a good combo too.
Not Obi-wan?
On one hand, he’s the negociator. On the other hand he’s the hand and legs taker. (Whether or not you want him in the elevator, depends on the hand he chooses to take.)
I’m old school. He didn’t make it out of the first movie.
If I grew up with prequels, then yeah. Chewie as well if I could fit a fourth.
What about that boy, what was his name? Anie i think. He seems innocent enough.
Eh, I’d say R2-D2 doesn’t count as a “man” at all, being neither human nor clearly gendered in any way.
I don’t know about feeling “safe” with Han, but unsafe in a good way. Like I trust him but not myself. Artoo could probably plug in and fix the elevator, too.
You need O’Brien to act as a lightning rod for any misfortune.
Please… No more…
Riker?
I hardly even know ‘er!
He’s charismatic and playfully flirty but receptive to signals and a good communicator. He wouldn’t do anything untoward without consent.
Sure, but you’d still come out of the elevator pregnant.
But that would happen completely consensual.
Oopsie poopsie, you got Lore!
Also the other Riker…
And Geordi has gotten fixated on your engineering skills…
I’ll take Thomas Riker any day over Ensign Picard.
Thomas Riker was alright, it’s not like he’s from the mirror universe
Now roll for shirt color.
Alright.
1d4, and this is the order; 1 = red, 2 = yellow, 3 = blue, 4 = green.
And I got 3, so that’s blue! :D
LaForge is occasionally kinda creepy…
Only if there’s a particularly attractive hologram nearby. Not a problem when stuck in an elevator.
Just put me with Pedro Pascal, in any role.
Pedro Pascal, Sir Ian Mckellan, and Sir Patrick Stewart.
I definitely wouldn’t want my human ass inside a metal box that is inconveniencing Magneto.
But what about very kind wizards?
My two older brothers and my dad
3x
I’d choose: Boromir, Ned Stark, and Sean Bean.
No way anything bad can happen to me with those magnets around.
I dunno. Might take Sharpe instead of Ned Stark, good to have someone that knows how to use a rifle
The whole elevator would just crash through the foundation. You’d be collateral when Death gets a 3 for 1 final destination style.
Nah, I think it’d go more like this:
- Get it in the elevator and see them all in there.
- Go to press the button for your floor (the top floor) and see that it’s already pressed.
- Have a pleasant trip up.
- Arrive at your floor and the doors open.
- All three politely allow you to exit first.
- Step out of the lift safely.
- Elevator malfunctions, plummets and crashes through the foundation.
- Walk off thinking how nice they all were.
first 3 celebridudes that popped into my head:
Tom Hanks, Keannu Reaves, and Willie Nelson.
You are NOT safe from Willie. He will get you SOOO high.
exactly why he’s on the list. I’m secretly trying to get to Hanks that high so he can laugh like he did in money pit.
Devious…
Also, Patrick Stewart.
totally could get down or up (elevator joke) with sirpatstew
Honestly if I was a woman any dude in life. Maybe even those goth dudes on black horses. Def the trees tho. They Hott af
Physically safe - but you’re gonna get sassed to within an inch of your life.
I don’t know; can you name three bears that women would feel safer with?
bear in the big blue house is one, for sure. he wouldn’t even need violence to stave off nasty people, he’d just make them feel bad.
Barenstain?
Let’s be real. We’re all NPCs so if any of the men are from something with action, we’ll probably end up dead. My pick would be Bob Ross, Mr. Rogers, and Steve Irwin. Super calming and chill
Steve was an amazing person but I wouldn’t describe him as chill.
He was pure overwhelming enthusiastic energy.
“Speed into one nostril, coke into the other”-energy
Fair point. Well, he’ll balance out the other two then. It’ll be like drugs (I assume), two downers and one upper
I never imagined I’d ever see someone compare Mr. Rogers to drugs, but here we are.
Enhanced
Is this AI?
Sadly. There’s no other copies of this meme that’s not infested by the jpegs. I didn’t have time to find the source to recreate it.
Now, however… hold my beer.
Edit
Oh God. That’s horrifying.
The meme from OP is not much better, though.
The jpegs are very scary.
I tried to come up with a counter argument and realized pretty quickly that I didn’t want to.
What’s the counter-argument ? Let’s hear it
I mean, they’re objectively correct.
Can we do 2 adult men and a bear?
At the same time?
Is the elevator spacious?
Ok I recognise Andre and Arnold, who’s the dude on the left?
Wilt Chamberlain.
The only NBA player to individually score 100 points in a game.
Arnold’s got a decent number of allegations against him, but Andre would protect you so I guess it’s honestly a freebie for the other two if he’s in the mix.
Andre was a sweetheart, but a famous alcoholic. You’d have to worry about him passing out drunk. You don’t want to get crushed by a 500 pound teddy bear in a small space.
There’s a story of him passing out drunk in a hotel bar and the staff just having to let him stay the night where he fell because they couldn’t move him.
I can’t believe how jacked Arnold is here. It’s truly remarkable.
Thats not even his peak, he was more jacked as Hercules and in the first Terminator film imo, before his movie career.
True that.
