When I got to know my gf’s mom and realized I didn’t have massive levels of stress and anxiety around her like I do with my mom.

Around the time my kids were graduating from highschool, she always made it seem like being a mom was this monumental task that no reasonable person could ever do well, just unbearably difficult so to cope you’d need to scream at and emotionally abuse your children or you’d never survive. There are two modes of mothering, ignoring your child or screaming at your child. My mom kept me fairly isolated and wouldn’t drive me anywhere despite living in along distance to nothing but other houses mostly filled with older couples so I never really got to see how “normal” families work or how other kids interacted with their parents, if I ever did manage to get an invite to a new friends house or an after school activity was forbidden from participating. Raising kids though, wow, such an incredible eye opener to just how easy kids are to love, how easy it is to raise children when you’re a sane and consistent parent. Motherhood isn’t inherently a screaming match between you and a child who never asked to be there that you hate because of their mere existence. Sure not everyone is cut out to be a mom, of course, but to present abuse as both normal and justified is evil. I don’t care how bad she had it as a kid, she was obligated to protect me from that just like I was obligated to protect my kids from the things she did to me. She was an early childhood education teacher and I’ve come to realize it’s because anyone over the age of ~4 is too much of a human being for her to handle, she only wants completely subservient, physically small children around because she can dominate them and any other social interaction that she’s not dominating the other person is intolerable to her. She’s a pathetic person truly

When my best friend started crying hysterically and begging to sleep over at our place because she knew she’d be severely beaten at home that night (for losing a hat at school that day). Not only was she not allowed to sleep over, but I was told off for asking. They did nothing about the abuse she told us about.

If I hadn’t known then I’d have known 2 years after when she screamed at me for going out of my way to save a kitten.

When i borrowed my mom’s car long ago and the radio was on Rush Limbaugh

I knew they were shitty to me and my brother, but rationalized most of it as being the product of a different culture and time. What really sealed the deal was finding out how shitty they were being to my elderly frail grandmother who was living with them. They made her last years on this Earth so miserable. I have lost all respect for them, I will never forgive them, and I’m glad to be hundreds of km away from them.

My parents are pretty good people other than being die hard conservatives. I understand there might be irony in that statement. Their real problem is they are just not politically educated and think repubs are the lesser of 2 evils. They have never been trumpers though…

Dad’s always been a selfish shit of a person. Growing up with it, it was just how he was so I sort of accepted it, or was conditioned to it. Drug dealer, spouse beater, thief, bully, tantrum thrower, no sense of patience, road rager. About two years ago he finally wanted to get on the internet, which can be a struggle for older novices. He had kept his head in the sand about it his entire life. But while at his place helping setup the laptop, pc and router I’d organised to get him started he had a full blown tantrum for about 15minutes because I wasn’t explaining everything to him, eg what dns is, not beginner stuff.

I’ve done about ten years jiu-jitsu. I could see he wanted to have a bigger tantrum but realised that I was a grown man who could take him in an altercation. Mind you he’s a coward, he can’t fight and always relied on his size 6’10" to intimidate people rather than any skill.

Growing up he encouraged me to be a thief, bully, drug dealer and welfare leech. It took me some time to work out I didn’t want those things for myself. Fuck that guy. Haven’t spoken to him in a few years now. Looking forward to a call from the authorities that he’s passed, I expect through his own hubris.

i started realizing more and more that my father’s jokes were racist. then i started noticing that his normal speech and interactions were racist.

i was brought up with this racism as a norm, so it took me a long time to realize we were a racist family (longer than i would like to admit).

then after a realizing how racist we were, i put two and two together… my father is a police officer.

My father worked as an environmental engineer for an oil company cleaning up oil spills and messes. He wanted a certain quality of life, so we only ever lived in southern or messed up states. Texas, Missouri and 7 years in Utah. Going to elementary school with the racist bigot Mormons was hell. Long story short he is a Neo-Liberal Boomer that helped the oil industry with his efficiency and diligence cover up issues and increase profits. A money hawk and penny-pincher, who wouldn’t move to blue states because of higher prices, believing in American Exceptionalism, and has zero regrets working for a company that helped destroy the world. I admit he’s not the worst by a long shot. But I would have preferred being broke and poor in another country and him not working for mankind’s enemies.

They voted for an orange hellscape and consume CCP/MAGA propaganda; after them proving themselves to be incapable of solving aspergers/ADHD and isolating themselves from the rest of the school community.

I was bemoaning the lack of action on global warming, and how all of civilization was at risk if we didn’t take action now, and my boomer mom replied,

“Why should I care? I’ll be dead by then!” 😞

Father was a systematically abusive pig.

Mother allowed it to happen for far too long.

I cut contact after finding out the latter was on the mailing list for the Nazi Regime of America. (Republicans, Students for ‘Life’ etc.)

Dad voted for trump the first election. Also they say some mildly racist things about Black people and Latinos

One of my brothers adopted a baby from Guatemala. He was a beautiful baby that grew up into a good man. He is 20 this year.

I knew that my mother and by extension my father were bigoted. She had made numerous comments while I was growing up that revealed that aspect of her. With that said, I had never seen her act upon it though. During a phone conversation with her we were talking about my new nephew and she stated: “He’ll never be a real grandchild.” When I asked why, she flatly stated because he was Latino. To me that was the point that I lost all respect for her. My Dad was a massive enabler as well.

She also showed a strong preference for those children/ grandchildren that looked like her. Brown hair with brown eyes.

She died in 2011 the week that the tsunami hit Japan. My life became a lot better after that. Dad died last year and I did not even go to his funeral.

When I heard my father decrying racism as wrong - and then turning right around in the very next sentence to say that homosexuals and trans people deserve god’s wrath.