So I’m European and am aware that American culture is very different in many ways. Idk if this is just some type of thing about American culture and mentality in general that has always been there or if it is a trend that started recently in the past few years.
I don’t wanna generalize any country and know that not everyone is like this but I definitely noticed this type of pattern.
I increasingly noticed in the past years that many Americans are very hateful/cruel, are lacking empathy, become more and more aggressive and it seems like it’s becoming worse.
I’m not sure if this is maybe related to Americans needing to be “though” or something because I always hear about that the American mentality is pretty competitive and individualistic and instead of saying “we will go through this this together” they often have this mentality “it’s either me or you but it can’t be both who will win”. I mean I’m pretty sure that all these things like this biking culture, driving big “manly” pick up trucks, wrestling, football etc. are pretty prevalent in America compared to other countries and American culture generally seems very loud and direct. I think here in Europe people are way more reserved and I guess the strongest opposite to Americans are probably Japanese people. Maybe American culture is generally more “rough” where they aren’t super sensitive and don’t really care how their words come over and just speak their mind (maybe cause they value free speech so much).
But to me this seems to go to the point where many Americans seem to have this attitude and are very ignorant and arrogant and basically think they’re better than anyone else and they only care for themselves.
And it feels like it’s so extreme to the point where everyone is hating, attacking and bashing on everyone and instead of being stronger united they’re just fighting against themselves and putting each other down and they always focus on the negative.
Especially online it seems like that no matter what the topic is and independent from whether they are Democrat or Republican they’re constantly bashing on someone and baselessly calling them “weak” even though in reality they’re probably the ones who are weak and trample onto people cause they’re obviously dissatisfied with themselves and aren’t able to man-up to face the real issues. You just can’t blame everything on others and have to take responsibility for yourself!
Some stuff that I’ve seen on American news like “Fox News” just seemed crazy where the reporters personally attack and bash on people which is something that would be unthinkable in Europe.
Even though many people were saying that Americans have this “fake friendliness” I’m thinking that even that disappeared in the last few years and they’re becoming more open to show what they really think which seems to be that they “don’t give a f* about you”.
Many Americans that I encountered seem so aggressive like they always need to bash onto something in this toxic way even though they’re actually in a very good position and have a lot to be grateful for. Like in other poor countries people have real problems and are literally starving because they have no food or they have war in their country.
I’m always thinking “dude, you need to chill” cause literally no one is attacking them and they’re fully secure. But it seems like they’re always searching for a fight or something.
It seems like many of these people are so disconnected from nature and become less human and I wonder why they can’t just spend meaningful time with other people being positive and not constantly waste their time with hating or complaining about something. Because this just doesn’t work and in a society with multiple people especially in a world where everything is more connected than ever we need to hold together and have empathy for one and another. That is one of the core morals that a human needs!
It seems like many Americans generally have this “cruelness” about them cause I also heard things that many Americans are physically beating their children and even the fact that guns are popular and legal in America to the point where you can’t even safely walk alone in public during the night or safely send your kid to school and also this general mindset of America is doing everything the best and “America first”. I really don’t wanna bash on Americans at all and only want to share my experience because I just haven’t experienced this type of hate here in Europe in that extreme way and it just makes me very uncomfortable because I feel like this mood is affecting the whole world since American media and influence is prevalent everywhere.
To me it feels like this won’t end well and it feels like it’s just a matter of time until something very bad happens like the second civil war or so and the storm on the capitol might be nothing compared to that. But maybe that’s the only way they will finally learn if they’re lacking these core morals and integrity and they don’t get educated about that in school.
It also seems like they can’t handle critique and can’t admit it/stand to those things. When I once asked a similar question on Reddit the only thing I got back was bashing and personal attacks and I hope it’s not the same here, cause that is literally just proving my point. There needs to be constructive discussions.
We’ve had a couple of reports about this post, but I’m going to let it slide for the moment because the discussion seems mostly respectful. Let’s keep it polite though please.
I suspect what you’re seeing is the increased frequency of vulgar American bigotry showing up in mass media, thanks to the unfiltered exposure of their behavior.
But I have to point out… this isn’t something new in the American psyche. Keep in mind that America has always been a deeply hateful and bigoted place. Go back to the years following 9/11 and look at how many mosques got burned. Consider that Congress banned French Fries in the cafeteria because the French PM wouldn’t toss in with our genocidal Iraq invasion.
Go back further than that, and you’ve got horrifying police violence aimed at African Americans, Latinos, and East Asians going back… centuries. All endorsed by a parochial upper class that funneled money to Apartheid South Africa, Nun-raping Contra Rebels in Nicaragua, and Fascist Mafiosos crawling all over the Mediterranean during the Years of Lead.
Our mass media has been overflowing with bigotry from modern day Steven Crowder all the way back to Father Coughlin’s antisemitic rants during the Great Depression.
America is a deeply rotten country full of awful people. And while we’re hardly alone in that regard, we export so much of that vileness abroad that its hard for outsiders to ignore.
Eyeballs on content equals money. Rage equals more eyeballs, thusly more money.
this, the “News” or, how people get information about their world, has been broken for 40 years or so
addictive, hate fueled, lie filled, drama news is the norm. murdoch must die
In my view, Social media is a big factor in creating echo chambers and disinformation.
To be fair, I think this is the official, mainstream view too.
It might explain a few things if this was an American thing, as I have experienced similar things as well, and I don’t know why either. Though in my case few of them identify as American.
What do you mean by “identify as American”?
I’m technically American, but America wants me dead. As such, I do not voluntarily identify as American anymore. Dunno if that’s what they’re referring to, but ye.
What do you mean by America wants you dead?
I’m trans. America’s right-wing, who are now in control, have repeatedly talked about how America needs to be purged of “transgenderism”.
That is deff a thing going on unfortunately. Y’all Qaeda needs to go. Good luck out there
Thank you for being sane
It’s not an American thing it’s a human thing.
The more time spent angry the more active and larger the amygdala gets.
So now when in a situation the amygdala is calling the shoots, and it’s either calling for blood or for you to run.
It’s how we evolved, if we’re surrounded by anger, fear, and confrontation we switch over to a mode that can handle that.
The current problem is fearmongering and billionaire ran media that keeps telling everyone to panic, so they do.
People get in this state from the media, interact with others and it spreads. Society as we know it is incredibly recent on an evolutionary scale, so it is often shocking how fast we can slide back to people who are thinking on a short timeline where 20 years is “forever ago”.
That’s not even getting into wealth inequality and how resource scarceness while young can fuck someone up for life.
I can corroborate, anecdotally, the behavioral side of this.
When I have conversations with notoriously angry people and can maintain my chill and treat them with dignity (despite whatever behavior they’re exhibiting), they usually chill out. The more of angry person they are takes more effort, but patience, calm, and respect diffuse things very effectively. The patience is really hard, but it has worked for me.
The problem, which is relevant to the physical changes you described, is that the effect is only temporary in isolation. I have found the repeating this over time with a person does cause their baseline anger level to reduce over time, but it’s a fuckton of work and difficult to scale due to the time commitment. It also doesn’t scale via media because this kind of behavior doesn’t draw attention. It’s an unfortunate bug in our psychology
Our standard of living is collapsing and we have no way out because all of our media is controlled by billionaires, all our politicians are controlled by billionaires, the economy is controlled by billionaires, our entertainment is controlled by billionaires. This is what the billionaires want, so it’s what the billionaires get. I’m probably about to lose my hrt and could soon find myself in financial ruin because Texas is trying to establish bounty laws that’d allow people to sue trans people and doctors who offer gender affirming care. Healthcare costs are out of control as well. It cost me $300 for a single appointment at planned parenthood to start hrt. My therapist, who I see weekly, costs over $200 a session. Insurance will not cover either one, because it doesn’t see either one as being medically necessary.
So yes, we are getting extremely pissed off.
Sorry you have to go through that. I hope you are able to get out of Texas at some point.
It fucking sucks, yo. “That’s just how life is” is becoming my mantra. Quite honestly, I’m not sure I’ll ever find a place where I’ll feel safe, secure and supported. I don’t think trans people get to have all three, nor will we ever.
I’ll tell you that where I live in America is waaaaaayyyy more accepting than what you’re describing. A friend transitioned a couple years ago, and said that the insurance, doctors and her job were all super helpful and understanding. A drag queen duo just sold out one of the most popular venues in the city multiple nights for their annual holiday show. Hell, the bar down the street from me has a trans couple who are regulars and nobody gives a shit (coincidentally, they just moved here from Texas). It’s not even a queer bar or anything, it’s just a normal watering hole.
A lot of places in America suck, but there are oases, is what I’m saying.
What state/city is this in? That sounds really nice, though I’m guessing it’s a very expensive place to live. Seems like you either get cheap and hateful, or expensive and tolerant in the US.
Edit: I actually really wanna know. Depending on the cost of living it might become my no. 1 destination.
Seattle. And yes, it’s fucking expensive. Outside of the city is cheaper, but diminishing returns on inclusiveness the farther away you get.
If you have a tech background, living here gets way easier.
Yeah, there’s no way I’ll ever be able to afford to live somewhere like Seattle.
Philly has a strong LGBTQ+ community and isn’t as prohibitively expensive to live in as Seattle. I work with some trans and nonbinary people in the city and they have told me they’re content living and working in Philly.
Before you give up entirely, check out some of the areas surrounding Seattle. The capital is a bit more affordable and there are a lot of state jobs.
So you’re stereotyping a country of 341 million people based off of your personal interactions with a few of them on the internet?
We’re not a monoculture, bud. How would you feel if I asked “Why does it seem like Europeans have become so judgmental and preachy in the past years?”
Typical answer. I wasn’t trying to stereotype but just share my experience. I haven’t experienced this type of hate here in Europe and it was a noticeable difference for me. But of course you are very welcomed to share your bad experiences with Europeans with us as long as it’s constructive.
Typical answer.
In what world is telling someone “typical answer” not a cunt response in a post about being civil
With that I meant that I wasn’t surprised that someone will be offended and condemn me as stereotyping even though I stated multiple times that that’s not my intention. I’m saying if anyone has critique towards Europe I’m very open and interested in it as well. But like I mentioned, if any it’s just proving what I said
Let’s not beat around the bush we’re both adults here. Using charged language is fun but you gotta own it when you do it.
Open mind is more of an aspirational handle I guess
See it is as if you want to argue over any price. You’re literally looking to fight with someone but I’m not. All I’m thinking is: why? It’s very immature
My bad if you’re actually trying to better wrap your mind around this. I think my frustration stems from the feeling that Europe doesn’t seem to realize they have much of the same problems as the US, just being 10 years behind, imo. We definitely are on more of a tinder box as a result of there being so many firearms in the country, but right wing populism is growing across the Atlantic just like it is thriving here. Im not going to try to invalidate what your friend has experienced since coming here.
I feel like there’s a bigger trend towards empty populism worldwide and authoritarianism that people aren’t realizing. It makes me feel like posts like this feed into a crab in a bucket kind of situation. It doesn’t help I’m from New Jersey and my state regularly gets mocked domestically so I’m already primed to be on edge. I wouldn’t have posted my last message, in hindsight.
18 days accounts. Only two posts are this. Looks like a troll
Yeah I’m going to shut up now because you may be right. Appreciate it.
Don’t be an asshole, lmao. You complain about Americans being bloodthirsty fucks and then you turn around and act like the typical “snooty, judgmental and condescending euro-prick” stereotype we have here in the states.
The reason why I’m engaging with you is because you’re not wrong, America has become extremely angry and bloodthirsty. However, that doesn’t give you an excuse to be condescending about it.
Don’t be an asshole, lmao. You complain about Americans being bloodthirsty fucks and then you turn around and act like the typical “snooty, judgmental and condescending euro-prick” stereotype we have here in the states.
I’m glad you were posting this cause that’s a great example of exactly what I meant. It’s just insulting, hateful and fully unconstructive. It was just a matter of time till one of these posts came.
On the contrary, the above comment gives actionable advice and explains why you’re wrong without using insulting language. This is perhaps the most constructive feedback you’ll get
You should try owning it! This is my solution. For “condescending and pretentious”, I read “intelligent and sophisticated”.
I think I understand now, Europe is a utopia the US is filled with hateful bikers and people driving big trucks?
Responding aggressively to a post asking why it appears that American culture has become more aggressive and hateful is not helping as much as you think.
Aggressively? How is “typical answer” aggressive? I think calling me stereotyping, an asshole and “snooty, judgmental and condescending euro-prick” is aggressive.
Bud
The media everywhere knows that showing people who are on an extreme gets more views. So that is what you will see from outside. As for the people you have meet. The chill people don’t travel as much.
We’re scared of the future I guess. Feel free to ask if you are genuinely curious about Americans.
America was built on a very fruitful land, the new comers had a lot of room to expand.
There weren’t any existing powers to stifle growth so it was “free” to grow as much as possible (this is what they mean by freedom).
The gold rush happened in California, then a lot (and I mean A LOT for its time) of oil production.
Then Europe had a couple of civil wars (I’m calling it that cause they fought themselves mostly) which gave US even more of an advantage.
The American experiment has had A LOT privileges because it was the new world. Those are ending but Americans believe they can keep the party going forever.
Europe had a similar boost during colonial times and that ended too, so chances are it will happen to US too.
Only two questions remain:
- Will it be as bloody as possible like WWII or more peaceful.
- Will Americans get their shit together after like Europe and form a strong union built on democracy.
As an American, I have despaired every day since the election about where we are headed. My hope is that, as in past times when we have lost our collective minds, we will find a way to self correct. Know that nearly half of all voters did NOT want this direction and many will be mounting a vigorous fight against fascism. Its going ti be ugly, though. I also despair for Europe who are about to see their fascists voices amplified to a very high volume.
I’m not American but I think the current wave of ugliness is because Obama was elected, and conservative people who are racist in their hearts didn’t like that an “uppity Negro” was in the most powerful position in the world for eight years, and they couldn’t come up with anyone palatable to beat him. So instead they found who is probably the most obnoxious person in the world to put at the helm of their party, and because conservatives have oppositional defiant disorder, and get off on someone being like they are openly, they flocked to him loudly, where more traditional conservative politicians knocked in vain, and it was just a chance for them to really be themselves. I think they’ve always been this way, but just not as loud about it.
Also Zuckface fuckface fed them a steady diet of weaponized disinformation about anyone who wasn’t white or Republican so it made them even uglier and stupider. But they’ll probably all die of preventable disease as time goes on, so that’s something to look forward to.
This “they’re just racists” theory is now comprehensively debunked. White-trash Indiana voted for Obama, and now brown people of all types are rushing into Trump’s arms.
If America’s progressives stick to this disastrous race essentialism, the Democrats are going to lose and lose and lose again. You need to snap out of it for the sake of the rest of the world.
It’s not about race, it’s about class.
Well I’m not American so it only matters to me in that the orange rapist wants to annex my country, but I did note that people had lynching effigies of Obama when he was elected hanging in their yards and stuff, so. I’m fine with being wrong if you say this is so, it’s just my observation.
Democrats aren’t progressive. That’s a big part of the problem actually.
The problem is confirmation bias. Americans are actually becoming more left-leaning and accepting. Younger generations are rejecting the hateful & destructive legacy of the US, and spreading this ideology to each other, which is exactly why the government is trying to ban TikTok. Just look at military recruitment numbers. Look at how well leftism and anti-imperialism performs in polling among people younger than boomers and Gen X.
But as communist theorists predicted would happen, as the population moves left the capitalists in power move further right and embrace fascism to entrench their power.
Leftism is spreading faster than fascism, but fascists do not threaten capital, so they’re not censored. Thus you see far higher representation of far-right fascism in the news and in positions of power, because that’s all they want you to see and the only people they allow into power. It tricks you into believing these ideals are gaining in popularity, when in reality it’s over representation of fascism by systems that don’t really oppose it.
For example, the majority of Americans support ending US funding of the genocide in Gaza. But if all you see is what’s allowed on the news and what the people in power support, you’d believe there’s overwhelming support in the US for the genocide. In reality, they’re increasing the police budgets to violently suppress criticism of the empire.
ITT: a bunch of Americans struggling to contain their simmering rage in order to formulate a coherent response.
Seriously though, I’m also European and OP’s little screed (which I skimmed after hitting a speed bump in paragraph 4) rings true to me.
A very recent example: the literal bloodthirstiness surrounding the healthcare executive’s murder. This really took me aback, not gonna lie. Made me very, very glad I’m not American. For a few days I even reconsidered what I’m doing here. After all, I wouldn’t want to be anywhere near such a baying mob if it were in the street.
In answer to the question, loads of books have already been written on it. For example, Ezra’s Klein’s Why We’re Polarized. Didn’t read it but I think he makes an argument for changing political incentives because of party re-alignment. A bit unsatisfying.
My first intuition is that it’s a reflection of America’s declining status in the world. A bit like a guy who’s lost his wife and his job, America is going off the rails because it’s losing its position as Top Dog in the world. Exhibit A in the genre: Russia. But then this can’t be quite everything. After all, Britain lost an absolutely colossal empire and stayed pretty sane. Japan and Germany bounced right back from total national humiliation, too.
Other theories, then. A subconscious awareness of impending ecological collapse propelled by America’s uniquely egregious overconsumption? An absence of a decent civil war for 150 years? Not the case for Europe! Maybe you’re just itching to kill each other because it’s been such a while?
I dunno but I think it’s a good question.
The real answer is they’ve been conditioned. They have so much excess, but rather than funnel that excess to those who need it, they all decide to hoard it and use it to gain as much more excess as possible.
They’re greedy. They’re entitled. They’re insecure. It’s a bad combination.
