I don’t even know how to say this anymore without sounding like a damn broken record, but ever since Trump got elected in November, my mental health has been slipping. And lately it’s not just slipping. It’s more like I jumped off a cliff and freefalling toward jagged rocks.
I’ve done everything I’m supposed to. I stay active. I run 3 to 5 miles on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. I exercise 3 to 5 days a week. I spend time outside. I touch grass. But none of it works anymore. It just doesn’t take the edge off like it used to.
I know doomscrolling makes it worse. I know the news and social media are built to keep people angry and scared. I try to pull away from it. But even when I do, I get hit from another angle. My girlfriend sends me political messages all day long, like she’s trying to convince me of something I already agree with. I’ve told her to give me some space, but it doesn’t stop. It’s like she needs me to be in constant panic mode with her, and I just can’t do it anymore.
Lately I find myself dreading conversation. I don’t even want to hear another human voice. I’m tired in a way I don’t know how to fix.
I thought retirement was going to bring me some peace. I’ve worked hard my whole life. I thought I had earned some quiet. Instead, the world keeps getting louder, and none of the things I used to do to cope are cutting it.
Is anybody else feeling this way?
If you’re not planning to volunteer to drive political change, and you’re not going to seriously plan to expatriate, then I suggest blocking the news and the other anxiety-inducing content. I have keyword filters in Boost to exclude lots of political stuff. I also pick the “do not recommend this” for google news posts that are political. Has done wonders for me. All my digital content is fun, hobby related, or general interest news from my area.
Personally I’ve lost a lot of my identity as an American and as a human being as a result of the past 10 years. Donald Trump’s presidency and COVID19 really changed who I am and how I think of the world. As a child I never would’ve imagined how bad the ignorance is, and how willfully people dig themselves into it. I’ve realized truth is merely an illusion.
What America was sold to me as a child; the greatest free nation to ever exist, the bastion of democracy and protector of the world turned out to be a complete lie. Turns out we were the perpetrators, the slavemasters, the financial dominators, and the war mongers the whole time. I look at my fellow citizens and I can’t see the commonalities anymore. I don’t know what to believe at this point. I’m not sure if there’s much worth believing in.
Lately I’ve just been adrift, letting the motions wash over me. Drugs are a lousy blanket.
This is really it, my entire worldview was shaken and is adrift. There was other non-COVID stuff around that time for me that intensified it, too. I look at that person from 2019 and feel like she is a stranger.
Get off anything news related and tell your girlfriend to knock it off. My wife used to send things or bring it up in conversation, and I tell her I don’t want to discuss any of this, because it pisses me off. It’s extremely selfish of your girlfriend to continue to send things after you’ve expressed your desire to not receive it.
You are struggling with the circle of concern. You’re spending time worrying about things that concern you but that you can’t change. You will feel better if you focus on things you can directly control or things you can influence.
So look more local. DO something positive in your community. It will help you feel grounded and effective.
I go to local protests, donate to the local food bank, etc. Even just showing up with intent feels positive. Heck, go to the library. Showing up helps their numbers and helps their funding.
I’ve made it my personal mission to get as many people I know out to the protests. It helps a little though I’m still hopelessly depressed.
Next nationwide protest is this Thursday! July 17th. Good trouble lives on.
Good trouble. This is the answer.
And good books, we’re not alone out here.
I just finished One Day, Everyone Will Always Have Been Against This by Omar El Akkad. Not just about Gaza and the collateral damage of empires, but also about the tiny manipulations we’re all subjected to that make us feel alone.
Great reading.
Note: the link is to the Chicago Review of Books.
Where does this stuff get posted? I hadn’t heard of the one on the 17th. I should go to one. This whole thread is hitting me pretty hard. I didn’t even want to go to the pool with the wife and kids today.
Thankfully someone I knew posted it on social media. Seems to be the only way information gets spread around now. Been trying to do the same. It’s by the same group that did the no kings protest and they have said they plan to continue planning protests so I would just follow that group for upcoming protests. I had googled “next no kings protest” after I heard about it and it popped up.
Good for you, I can’t make myself do it. People would react a weird way if I went to any protests ha.
Let them.
I remember waking up like the morning after election day in 2016 and was shocked why a competent woman lost against some bussinessman who was never in politics (this was way before I fully understood politics), I was rooting for Hillary to become the first woman president, I was already feeling very egalitarian at the time, and also because she’s a Democrat. Also because I immigrated to the US, so I naturally root for the more pro-immigration candidate. So yea I heard the news that Hillary lost despite having more votes, thats around the time I learned about the electoral college and that felt like bullshit. Luckily, I had derivative citizenship at the time, so I didn’t really think too deep.
But now this 2nd term is honestly terrifying. both the 2020 and 2024 election nights was just filled with dread, and now that fear has become a reality, doesn’t feel remotely to the first term.
Anyways, now my brain is so scrambled like an egg. Idk wtf is life anymore. Kinda having an “identity crisis” about my nationality/citizenship because that thought of potentially being deported is constantly lingering on the back of my mind ever since 2024 the morning following election night after the results were announced. I mean if I lose my citizenship, I’m gonna look so silly for ever refering to myself as an “American”. That’s like saying you’re part of the family, then your parents removes you from the will.
Oh yea I have no other citizenship. My previous country does no do dual citizenship, and its a dictatorship. Funny how I’m running from one dictatorship right into another. 🙃
Depression definitely does not mix well with political instability/autocratization.
The issue is there’s a large subset of people who view politics as their superbowl. I know these people. The stupidity is scary.
This administration ends the same way Mussolini’s did.
The way we prevent it from happening in the future is to force wealth equality.
You are NOT ALONE.
There has been a fucking epidemic of mental unwellness cascading since November.
We are all dealing with this, you are NOT alone.
This is a known and statistically verified fact.
What you are feeling is a normal response to a clear and present danger. If anything, your reaction is rational.
Fucking stay strong, we in this together, those of us who know, know, and we watch out for our fellow brothers and sisters.
You are not forgotten, you are not left behind, we are all just regrouping. Your emotions are valid, yes, this is real, this is not a drill, reality is in a state of emergency, and you are not insane.
Ok?
❤️
My wife had me block CNN at the network level to stop her reading all the news and becoming depressed.
I have basically felt that the future was all down hill 10 years ago. Nothing has convinced me otherwise. Thats why I stay in my own little bubble and try to disconnect from the happenings. There is no point raging about what we can’t change.
I have a hard time watching the news now too. News outlets only show “good news” which is the administration succeeding, which hurts. I want stories of hope.
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I can only speak for myself, but there is more to this than just fear of death. It is my eyes being forcibly opened to how evil and stupid so many people are. I’ve always known there was evil in the world, I’ve always known that from time to time evil comes into power and does an enormous amount of damage, but I never in a million years could have guessed how widespread and common evil really is. People I love, and who I thought loved me are showing their true colours, as are people I have known for decades. I can’t help but look back on my life and think “Was all this fake? The good times, the memories, was it all just bullshit? Were you evil the whole fucking time??” If we were in Germany in the 40s, these are the people who would have sold me out to the Nazis.
Being born on this planet and living through a time like this is like being six years old and arriving at an amazing looking birthday party with balloons and cake and presents and pony rides, only to find out that the cake has been poisoned, the ponies are being beaten with a whip, and your best friend is trying to stab you to death with the cake knife because he wants your balloon. Being at a party with people like that kind of spoils the whole experience.
Being surrounded by evil and stupidity, being betrayed by the ones you love, it makes me feel like all the good times and memories are just an illusion and there is nothing for me here. No point to any of it. So my mental health suffers, just like OP’s mental health suffers. I can’t see a way out of this. What has been seen cannot be unseen. What has been realized cannot be unrealized. So, it isn’t the fear of death that is getting to me. It’s living in this fucking nightmare.
Agreed. The way people act today makes everything before seem purely performative. I’m not terribly surprised that certain family members drank the kool-aid, but to know what became of the same people who held me on the day of my baptism is scary.
That goofy, fun loving person that I remember I used to be is now replaced with a quiet, cynical shut in. My dream of living in a house I own is forever gone. Debt, disease in the family, the onset of potential wars, and the cost of just being alive have pushed that fun loving person down into a deep dark hole. I used to live in fear of the world ending in fire but now, as fucked up as it may sound, I kind of sympathize with the villains in movies. The world has gotten to the point, in my opinion, that shit needs to burn to make way for a new world. This world is just too fucked up beyond repair. It needs a hard reset. So, you’re not alone. The mental health has taken a nose dive and hit every branch of the ugly tree on its way down.
I feel like your issue is that you’re not probably giving yourself space.
Being active is good, it’s healthy. However, that’s not what you need. What you need is a break. You need a break from politics and social media. You need to have a complete reset mentally, and the way to do that is to shut off all the noise and spend at least a month living your life without any social media. Like actually take the steps to block all the social media apps/sites for all your devices. That means no Lemmy, no Reddit, no Discord, no Instagram, no Facebook, nothing.
You also need to talk with your girlfriend and tell her to stop talking about politics with you full stop, perhaps this would be good for her as well, but I digress. You need to explain to her as well as understand yourself that this is a serious boundary that you need to have for your well being. You’re aware that doomscrolling and social media are bad for you, however, you need to take action to give yourself the break that you need.
trauma bonding is a real thing and victims sometimes seek out content to continue traumatization.
your gf is likely seeking comfort through the trauma of current events. since you’re both seeking the same thing (comfort) but through different methods you should take the initiative and invite her over to spend time together. set boundaries on what you will and will not talk about though. if she can’t follow your needs then you might want to reconsider the relationship.
there’s no reason to sacrifice your own mental health for someone who refuses to consider your emotional state.
Here’s a book about people describing similar experiences during the nazification of another country, it’s called They Thought They Were Free. I’m going to spoiler a link to a copy so it doesn’t autoload a swastika on our cool people board. This book isn’t about politics, it’s about how it feels when your country falls to fascism.
