May your marinara sauce never cling to your pasta!
You are a monster.
I kinda like the only-mildly-violent ones, like “I hope you step on a Lego!”
Every bedsheet you ever buy will get terrible pilling within a month (even the expensive ones!)
So cruel! I like it.
Oh not the pilling!!
Get a tax bill
May you step in dog shit every day and be oblivious until it’s pointed out by someone else.
May your toilet seat be forever frozen.
Or oddly hot… like someone’s only just finished a 15 minute blow out
You son of a bitch.
I’m in.
May your toilet paper forever tear lengthwise.
May you get the hiccups every time you need to be calm or confident.
May you start every sentence with “Like,”
Like whyd you have to do that? Like its so annoying!
Scoob!
May the other side of your pillow be always warm.
May one shoelace be permanently tighter than the other just enough to be annoying.
How does that work for shoes without laces?
They get incurable cancer
Already have it, your curse has failed.
Wow, you are a particular kind of cruel.
May your taint be rubbed raw every time you exercise, no matter how well manicured it may be.
I hope you step on a lego block
That is violent…very violent
An arch cramp for 2 minutes every day at a random time.
You mean this spasm pain in the foot? Damn, they are annoying!
or a jaw cramp.
Ideally while you need to explain something important
Ooof. Or that thing in your chin just under your tongue.
yup, that’s the one!
I hate those cramps. They are the worst
Every liquid product that you try use (glue, shampoo, toothpaste, etc) will be clogged with the dried product requiring a small pick to clear the clog before use.
NSFW: The latest Oglaf is relevant: https://www.oglaf.com/flypaper/
