No, deer are rats with hooves.
Rats are cute and intelligent.
And host tasteful dining experiences.
and carry tasteful plagues!
Some of them also have spiky heads.
Deer are delicious rats with hooves
They’ll also eat absolutely anything, including other deer, and many are infected with CWD which basically turns them into zombies 🤔
Geese are TASTY
I like their fatty livers.
Very tasty and when cooked properly at the right time of year are more like a roast beef than poultry.
I’ve had it roasted whole over a fire, roasted like a turkey in the oven, boiled in stew, pan fried, split roasted over a fire, smoked, seasoned and preserved in salt, pork fat and goose fat. I grew up eating it with rice, potatoes, carrots and dumplings. I could drink the gravy like an energy drink. I used to sit with my mom every spring to roast dozens of gizzards and hearts while I helped her pluck, gut, prepare the birds for smoking and eating.
In the wilderness I’m not afraid of geese because i see them as food. In the city I’m afraid of geese because if I killed one to eat, I’d be arrested for some kind of law and sent to be evaluated for a mental disorder.
I smoked one for Christmas. Delicious. Oh, and smoked goose fat is amazing.
I wish I was able to digest fat 😭
why is squirrel spelled like a professor from Hogwarts?
Because they are Professors at Hogwarts.
Cobra Chicken. That is all.
Hey!
We have geese here and basically come in during spring and literally take over. They are all over the beach, shit on every grass patch and generally have attitudes when you walk by. Some even posturing up like they are going to charge.
They are the assholes of the bird kingdom. They sit on roof tops and beak off from 4am to 7am, honking like a meteor is headed right for us.
They are unlovable!
Just because they do not take shit from humans and are violent avian insurrectionists that absolutely will ruin your day doesn’t mean they are unworthy of love.
Those most needing of love are the hardest to love.
Turtles are SURPRISINGLY FAST and also have SHELL ACCESS so every Linux geek should appreciate them
“Squirells”
It’s a crossbreed of squirrels and Purell
At least they’re clean!
Actually owls are really stupid. Like surprisingly stupid
Yup. They are lovable dum dums…
And by lovable I mean they will like exactly one person and wish death on everyone else. Just because you can have one as a pet and it will be your bestest friend doesn’t mean it’s a good idea. Owls do not understand vacations or sick days.
How so? I thought they’re great hunters?
Big eyes -> no room for brain
when it looks at a crossword, it thinks it can solve it. but it can’t.
(courtesy: the taskmaster’s assistant)
Compared to say, a crow, an owl is a certified fucking moron
I went to a falconry centre a while back and the guy had an owl that could fly perfectly well, but it’d just run around on its stumpy little legs instead. Nowhere near the smarts of the kestrel that pissed off for several hours instead of participating in the falconry show.
Let me ask you this, do you run all the time? You can do that and It’s faster, but why’d you choose to walk slowly most of the time?
If human can fly, I doubt we would do that all the time as it’s way more energy intensive and less durable.
I think those owls are up to something.
I’m a falconer. Basically no one uses owls for falconry because they have poor generalization intelligence. They have a really hard time transferring knowledge from one situation to another. So you get them flying to you inside and they are nailing it, then you move outside and it has no idea what to do. Every new situation needs to be trained. They are fine for shows and stuff when they are doing the same thing over and over again but constantly putting them in new situations like hunting would do is a recipe for disaster. A “lot”(maybe a dozen a year in US lol) of falconers try to use owls but very few are successful with them.
Yeah. Three licks my ass.
To be fair, the dumb owl cheats.
A single “s” removed and that would be a wildly different sentence.
Opossums are my favorite animal. They’re so cute!
My owl friend has returned to my neighborhood and I can hear him hooting at night. I’ve never met, interacted with, or seen this friend, but I love him all the same.
I haven’t heard my owl friend yet this year. I hope he shows up.
Try leaving out some tootsie roll pops.
You might be able to draw it closer by finding a YouTube video of calls by the same species and playing it when your owl buddy is around
Inside a goose’s mouth.
That’s all I have to say on the matter.
nothing says “you looking for trouble mf?” better than red bordered eyes and a tongue filled with tiny razors
Cobra chicken
Squirrels aren’t just good climbers, squirrels are professional circus performers who are constantly putting on free shows for everybody.
Squirrels are hilarious, they don’t get enough credit.
My neighborhood squirrel hung upsidedown on our bird feeder holding the top with his feet while he ninja’d seeds out of the feeder. I was more impressed than anything.
I bet he drinks Carling Black Label.
Geese make a great defensive line.
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You can bribe a guard dog, you won’t bribe a flock of geese. The owner will know you are there, and there WILL be blood!
The thing with geese, is that they’re not loyal to anyone. They’re playing for their own team.
Ravens make this gurgling throw up noise which is pretty cool
They also form symbiotic relations with wolf packs for hunting, even forming bonds with pups by playing with them.
No wonder theyre associated with Odin, smart, tricksy, assholes, likes wolves.
They’re also citizens, native-born.
Imagine how elections would go if animals coukd vote.
Perhaps we should have designated human voters to represent animals.
In the Netherlands, we have a political party to represent them. It’s called the Partij voor de Dieren (Party for the animals) and they’re a green left wing party.
