What qualities do you covet?
I’m great, so I wish I had more money.
Be able to draw fast. I’m hilariously slow at drawing 😂
Stay out of the wild West
Not having any signs or traits of being neurospicy
I feel that. I wish I was neurotypical, cis, and mentally well :(
I’m seeing that word come up moreadays. What do you mean by it?
It’s a tongue in cheek way of referring to neurodivergence. The same way that someone might refer to neurotypical as neurobland.
Its funny cuz I’m quite vanilla but I’m not neurovanilla
I wish I didn’t have an addictive personality. I just wanna be a casual heroin user, is that too much to ask for? I don’t want to sell my mom’s TV for another hit rather have a job and pay for my own scores. Ya know responsibly
I don’t think think its necessarily an addictive personality that makes one susceptible to heroin. Heroin (especially in the format its consumed) is basically pure pleasure/heaven all at once since all the RoA are all IV/snort/smoke, anyone would end up with a problem after like a week.
Can I ask what heroin seems to be acting as a balm or buffer for?
I wish to know, what free will even is, and how it could be possible.
I seen a lot of people have this particular question and the question that I have for them is what isn’t free will?
On the religious side you’ve got the people who are saying God knows everything so he already knows what you’re going to do. On the science side you’ve got all humans are just chemicals in a hot dog casing.
My opinion is, either which way you look at it you are free to choose what you want to do.
Just because somebody can make you question the freedom of your choices does not mean that your choices are not born of free will.
Here’s my take, and you can do with it as you will.
We don’t have free will, how could we? We are, as you said, chemicals in a hot dog casing. When I see something I want to eat, it’s because chemicals tell me I’m hungry and it will provide sustenance. When I do something that I enjoy, and want to pursue, my brain is receiving chemicals that it enjoys, and tells me to continue doing actions that produce said chemicals. I can choose to do these things or not, but my choice in and of itself is determined by… more chemicals.
But why does it matter, if those chemicals also tell “me” that “me” is the one in charge?
It’s like the cave/ shadow metaphor (that I will poorly paraphrase and misuse); hold a chair in front of a candle, show me the shadow, call it a “table” for my entire life, and the first time I see a chair I will say, “so this is what a table looks like!” It doesn’t matter that it’s actually a chair, just like it doesn’t matter if I actually am making my choices. My reality (and your reality) is what I perceive and accept, and nothing more. Logically, I understand that when presented the choice between A and B, my body and the chemicals composing it are the ones “making” the decision, and I’m just acting it out. I get that. But if someone says, “do you want really want to watch The Lord of the Rings again?” I already know that the world has changed, because I feel it in the water, feel it in the earth, and smell it in the air.
And that’s my choice, chemicals be damned.
There’s this nice dialog that’s written by logician and taoist Raymund Smullyan that is about a man asking god to abscond him off free will. I will not spoil the plot but it has some great turns and offers insights on the absurdities and (im) possibilities of the desire not to have free will (and of talking to god).
It’s a long read, mind you but it may give you more insight on what you want to know about.
https://www.mit.edu/people/dpolicar/writing/prose/text/godTaoist.html
Thank you for sharing this 🙏🏽 good read.
I wish I was persuasive
A really old book, how to win friends and influence people, can teach you this.
TBH I don’t want have to change at all, I’m just saying in the magic genie scenario I’d wish that people agreed with me
That I was as socially confident as other people seem to be, I don’t care if it’s all a facade, I want to be able to use the facade.
Like with most skills, one becomes confident with practice.
I’m a natural introvert and an only child and therefore has little practice of taking to others. I had no idea of how important small talk is. I learned by working in a bar, where social interaction can’t really be dodged and found out that social interaction isn’t that daunting as it seemed to me.
It still not my biggest hobby yet I’m not longer afraid of social interaction like I used to be.
What helps me is knowing that everyone is fucking awkward.
I’ve met thousands upon thousands of people and I have never met anyone who is not socially awkward, just a lot of people who are socially skilled in different ways.
The people who don’t come across as awkward are the people who acknowledge their awkwardness and own it, who give themselves an opportunity to fumble with their awkwardness and to get used to it the same way you do with any other difficult thing like math or reading or studying or dance or games.
I said all of that to say, not being awkward is not a talent, it is a skill, and you can learn it.
To not procrastinate.
I’ll comment on this later.
If it was me (which it was), I’d set a reminder and then every time I got a notification, I’d push it off until later. Also, I’d hate my(past)self for making the commitment to have to deal with the notifications.
Ugh, notifications to do something are the worst! My notification to pay my credit card comes up and I’m like, just leave me alone already! I’ll do it tomorrow!
Fitness/athleticism.
This for sure! I didn’t appreciate my knees enough when they worked better.
Good health. But alas.
Wish I wasn’t depressed and anxious so I could do what normal people seem to do normally every they meanwhile it takes me a week if I have better episode.
I wish my relationship wasn’t so very, very, very, very bad. And I wish I could be independent financially and not trapped as I am.
You honestly have no idea how bad it can get. Don’t ignore red flags.
That sucks. I’m sorry.
Thank you.
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I wish i was genuinely kind. Faking it is exhausting, and confusing.
I sometimes wish I could be social without feeling mentally and physically drained.
Same, its always seems to take a toll no matter how well it goes or how much I like the others
I really struggle to answer this even though I have this constant feeling of something being wrong. I’ve been quite lucky with genetics and the things I’ve wanted to change that can be changed I pretty much already have.
I guess there are two things I’d like to even further improve on:
- I’d like to care less. I like myself the least when I get emotionally captured. I’d like to just be able to let it go and be teflon where nothing sticks.
- I’d like to naturally want to read more.
Reading can feel like such a chore, even if you enjoy it.
I have trouble getting started. I’m not sure why I feel as though I should only read a book at a time, and that I should finish every book I start.
So I am trying to treat reading more like how I watch TV. I can start and stop, maybe skip a slow episode (chapter, page). I read more than one book at a time. I just swap between books as my interest changes.
Also, audiobooks have been a really great way for me to read more. I listen on walks, while driving, doing odd jobs, or just while playing some mindless game that keeps my eyes and hands occupied while I listen.
It’s just so much more fulfilling than listening to music. I find nothing is quite comparable to the way books capture a moment. Theres just so much perspective and wisdom even in fiction books, they can make other media seem somewhat shallow in comparison sometimes.
If you get/have a library card, see if they support overdrive/libby. I periodically replace my social media apps on my homescreen with a book reading app. When muscle memory decides its time to doom scroll, I end up reading a few pages of a book on my phone instead.
About caring less, I cant claim to have figured it out, but read stoic philosophy seems to help put me on the right track. My understanding is its the basis for a lot of modern psychotherapy, and it seems to make a lot of sense to me.
Do you listen to podcasts too or just audiobooks? In my case, I already listen to a lot of podcast, and I feel like when I’d have a chance to listen to audiobook, I’d just rather put on a podcast. Though perhaps some non-fiction, especially if read by the author.
