I don’t mean to sound insensitive, as I totally support UBI and universal healthcare and removing corporate profit motives from anything related to individual, collective, or environmental well-being.
But this ADHD persecution complex can sometimes get out of hand. Could Katie really not ask a family member close friend for help with this?
Again, not trying to downplay the bureaucratic nonsense or unfairness here. I’m just saying this paints the task as impossible when maybe it’s not.
I think reinforced digital isolation is a big part of the problem. This is something that could be solved by calling the service phone number or asking at the library or a help group, a doctor’s office etc… It might be extra hoops to jump through but there’s not any physical or communication barrier completely blocking her. Instead she clicks a button and gets a form and automatically feels completely helpless.
A 20 page form should take like ~30-45 minutes with help, it’s not a huge ask and doesn’t require as strong of a support network as some people in this thread are claiming. She’s got a phone and can read and talk, the only thing that could lower this hurdle further is support information being stapled to the front of the form.
Now it’s a different issue once the bureaucracy requires multiple followups, workday visits, transportation for evaluation, etc…
Could Katie really not ask a family member or close friend for help with this?
If she gets to it or even knows about it.
No, seriously, that’s a real problem with mental dysfunctional disorders. There are lot’s of institutions/help groups (at least here) that are happy to help. But you don’t know what you should know.
As someone with ADHD, finding the energy to ask someone for help can be just as difficult as sucking it up and just filling out the form. That’s the problem with ADHD: your brain physically stops your body from getting up and doing the things it needs to do.
Personally I need to be high as fuck on stimulants to accomplish anything, which sucks ass cause I really hate how they make me feel. But I can’t accomplish shit unless I’m absolutely tweaking off my ass on Adderall like a fucking meth addict.
Went through diag with husband last year. The paperwork they got me to fill out out was pretty basic, but detailed, and if he had the familial network to recognise and support his condition, he wouldn’t have gotten diagnosed in his 40’s.
As someone with a family who absolutely doesn’t give a single shit about the difficulty of living with ADHD and just tells me to “get over it and stop being so lazy”… yes, they most likely didn’t have anyone willing to lend a hand and help them in the way they needed help because regular people don’t tend to think of the things we struggle with as being challenging enough to warrant needing assistance with.
Having a supportive community is a privilege that so many take for granted.
No I mean… you’re right. A lot of people are now claiming ADHD prevents them from being anything but a leech. It’s disrespectful as fuck to people with ADHD who bust their ass overcoming their disability. Its almost always from someone “self-diagnosed” also.
You don’t “overcome” your disability, you just get insults, especially against your character. You get accused of trying to slack, accused of playing dumb, Faking, and labor for very little, when all it would take is for employers to get out of your way, let you use your coping tools, notes, videos, and not try to force you to do things the way they do because they can, and it is somehow “unfair” not to.
I can and would just do my fucking job, if someone didn’t fucking yell at the top of their lungs, because I didn’t do a given task in order (still finished it).
For some (like me) it’s less “overcome” and more “manage to the best of my ability”.
Sometimes I will forget something important. I forget interactions with people the next fucking day. I sit and scroll for hours on my phone and scream internally to get the fuck up and just not be able to.
Certain things help. But you can definitely be more then a leach.
Yep, but you’re trying. No one with actual ADHD is ever going to fully overcome it. I’m referring to the people who magically have crippling ADHD when it comes to being responsible with anything (Chores, a job, etc.) But if its something they want to do they’re magically fine. They can listen to instructions and follow them keenly when their family is taking them paragliding, but they couldn’t wash a dish for 8 seconds.
My understanding is that this is because it’s a dopamine problem. Some (many?) ADHD folks are wired such that they only function when their brains’ reward centers are getting pinged. That’s why they struggle with chores or bills or other ‘adult’ tasks that require focus but no feeling of reward or satisfaction until much later. According to my partner it’s a source of a tremendous amount of guilt and self-esteem problems.
Well, suicide is on the table, since we aren’t even allowed to live in a tent in some forest, society is literally forcing us to interact (which we can’t do safely).
In the context of a trillion dollar annual military budget with things like $10,000 screws, the idea that entitlements must be means tested to ensure nobody “undeserving” actually gets them demonstrates what this country actually values: the public coffers exist to line the pockets of capitalists at the expense of the public
No dispute from me there. The system is immensely fucked and it might take a long, long time to fix. But the reality here and now is that getting pretty much any kind of service requires paperwork and callbacks and all the other BS.
I had a friend trying to get disability for a laundry list of problems that left her unable to do much, and the judge ruled against her with an example job of folding sheets and towels at a hotel. No hotel we could find employed a person to do that job alone, nor am I convinced she or anyone could do that job for 8 hours at a time, but still it was enough to get her case dismissed.
However, it did start a paper trail that helped her win disability several years later in a more progressive district. She now lives in a 6 person polycule, 5 of whom are disabled.
It’s the level of hoops an ADHD person needs to jump through to get any treatment, let alone adequate treatment. Forms, calling for appointments, more forms, tracking stuff, nagging your doctor to full prescriptions, and so on. Every step of which is another wall to climb for an ADHD person.
Everything about the process to get both diagnosed and treated involves tasks that are not compatible with the ADHD brain.
Or stuff that is really difficult to get. Part of the diagnostic process for my psychiatrist needs me to arrange a 30 minute interview with a family member (which only works if you have a family member who is willing to do so, believes that ADHD isn’t just a personal failing, or has the time to arrange such a thing), or reports from primary school, which most people aren’t likely to keep around when they’re an adult in university.
If you don’t have either of those, no diagnosis for you, and you’re out several hundred dollars for nothing.
I don’t mean to sound insensitive, as I totally support UBI and universal healthcare and removing corporate profit motives from anything related to individual, collective, or environmental well-being.
But this ADHD persecution complex can sometimes get out of hand. Could Katie really not ask a family member close friend for help with this?
Again, not trying to downplay the bureaucratic nonsense or unfairness here. I’m just saying this paints the task as impossible when maybe it’s not.
I think reinforced digital isolation is a big part of the problem. This is something that could be solved by calling the service phone number or asking at the library or a help group, a doctor’s office etc… It might be extra hoops to jump through but there’s not any physical or communication barrier completely blocking her. Instead she clicks a button and gets a form and automatically feels completely helpless.
A 20 page form should take like ~30-45 minutes with help, it’s not a huge ask and doesn’t require as strong of a support network as some people in this thread are claiming. She’s got a phone and can read and talk, the only thing that could lower this hurdle further is support information being stapled to the front of the form.
Now it’s a different issue once the bureaucracy requires multiple followups, workday visits, transportation for evaluation, etc…
If she gets to it or even knows about it.
No, seriously, that’s a real problem with mental dysfunctional disorders. There are lot’s of institutions/help groups (at least here) that are happy to help. But you don’t know what you should know.
As someone with ADHD, finding the energy to ask someone for help can be just as difficult as sucking it up and just filling out the form. That’s the problem with ADHD: your brain physically stops your body from getting up and doing the things it needs to do.
Personally I need to be high as fuck on stimulants to accomplish anything, which sucks ass cause I really hate how they make me feel. But I can’t accomplish shit unless I’m absolutely tweaking off my ass on Adderall like a fucking meth addict.
Went through diag with husband last year. The paperwork they got me to fill out out was pretty basic, but detailed, and if he had the familial network to recognise and support his condition, he wouldn’t have gotten diagnosed in his 40’s.
You’re assuming they have someone supportive in their life.
As someone with a family who absolutely doesn’t give a single shit about the difficulty of living with ADHD and just tells me to “get over it and stop being so lazy”… yes, they most likely didn’t have anyone willing to lend a hand and help them in the way they needed help because regular people don’t tend to think of the things we struggle with as being challenging enough to warrant needing assistance with.
Having a supportive community is a privilege that so many take for granted.
That’s a very good point and I should have considered it. Appreciated.
I’ve been diagnosed with adhd. I’ve had multiple doctors completely ignore it. Just nothing. It’s still untreated. This is mental health is America.
Yeah, my partner has it too and says the exact same thing. Sorry bud :( Keep telling people, more folks need to know that’s how it is.
No I mean… you’re right. A lot of people are now claiming ADHD prevents them from being anything but a leech. It’s disrespectful as fuck to people with ADHD who bust their ass overcoming their disability. Its almost always from someone “self-diagnosed” also.
You don’t “overcome” your disability, you just get insults, especially against your character. You get accused of trying to slack, accused of playing dumb, Faking, and labor for very little, when all it would take is for employers to get out of your way, let you use your coping tools, notes, videos, and not try to force you to do things the way they do because they can, and it is somehow “unfair” not to.
I can and would just do my fucking job, if someone didn’t fucking yell at the top of their lungs, because I didn’t do a given task in order (still finished it).
For some (like me) it’s less “overcome” and more “manage to the best of my ability”.
Sometimes I will forget something important. I forget interactions with people the next fucking day. I sit and scroll for hours on my phone and scream internally to get the fuck up and just not be able to.
Certain things help. But you can definitely be more then a leach.
Yep, but you’re trying. No one with actual ADHD is ever going to fully overcome it. I’m referring to the people who magically have crippling ADHD when it comes to being responsible with anything (Chores, a job, etc.) But if its something they want to do they’re magically fine. They can listen to instructions and follow them keenly when their family is taking them paragliding, but they couldn’t wash a dish for 8 seconds.
It’s on a scale. Some ARE that disabled, like down syndrome tier disabled.
As for me, even if I was, I’m still getting paid, and the only way someone is finding out is if I accidentaly kill someone (serves them right).
My understanding is that this is because it’s a dopamine problem. Some (many?) ADHD folks are wired such that they only function when their brains’ reward centers are getting pinged. That’s why they struggle with chores or bills or other ‘adult’ tasks that require focus but no feeling of reward or satisfaction until much later. According to my partner it’s a source of a tremendous amount of guilt and self-esteem problems.
So I guess AuADHD just doesn’t exist to you then, huh? You have no clue about proper mental health and the challenges people experience.
Seriously, shut the fuck up.
That’s part of ADHD for a lot of people: hyperfixation/focus on topics that interest them, and struggles otherwise.
Yup. It’s something that’s crippling to us for sure, but imo doesn’t hurt to acknowledge that it makes us a total piece of work for our surroundings.
What I take the person above to say is that there’s just too many people who expect everyone else to accept their annoying habits.
Which, well, I don’t even accept in myself so it’d be rich to expect others to do.
Well, suicide is on the table, since we aren’t even allowed to live in a tent in some forest, society is literally forcing us to interact (which we can’t do safely).
In the context of a trillion dollar annual military budget with things like $10,000 screws, the idea that entitlements must be means tested to ensure nobody “undeserving” actually gets them demonstrates what this country actually values: the public coffers exist to line the pockets of capitalists at the expense of the public
No dispute from me there. The system is immensely fucked and it might take a long, long time to fix. But the reality here and now is that getting pretty much any kind of service requires paperwork and callbacks and all the other BS.
I had a friend trying to get disability for a laundry list of problems that left her unable to do much, and the judge ruled against her with an example job of folding sheets and towels at a hotel. No hotel we could find employed a person to do that job alone, nor am I convinced she or anyone could do that job for 8 hours at a time, but still it was enough to get her case dismissed.
However, it did start a paper trail that helped her win disability several years later in a more progressive district. She now lives in a 6 person polycule, 5 of whom are disabled.
Ok, the last part is wtf. Personal choices man, not related
Just sharing the eventual happy ending to a sad story.
It’s the level of hoops an ADHD person needs to jump through to get any treatment, let alone adequate treatment. Forms, calling for appointments, more forms, tracking stuff, nagging your doctor to full prescriptions, and so on. Every step of which is another wall to climb for an ADHD person.
Everything about the process to get both diagnosed and treated involves tasks that are not compatible with the ADHD brain.
Or stuff that is really difficult to get. Part of the diagnostic process for my psychiatrist needs me to arrange a 30 minute interview with a family member (which only works if you have a family member who is willing to do so, believes that ADHD isn’t just a personal failing, or has the time to arrange such a thing), or reports from primary school, which most people aren’t likely to keep around when they’re an adult in university.
If you don’t have either of those, no diagnosis for you, and you’re out several hundred dollars for nothing.
My father straight up lied to the psychiatrist and ruined my chances forever. I wanted my mother to go, but she was busy.
Good luck getting diagnosed in Serbia, and then it’s only a liability, since people will believe you are making up reasons, and faking it.