First, you have to memorize the menu backwards and forwards. Not just the items, but also the ingredients and the cooking techniques […]

The servers in the local resurant here have a small tablet and can just look this up on the fly. No need to memorize anything. Not quite sure about the allergens, but that could easily be solved with software.

I can see how this could be a required skillset for a waiter in a super high-class restaurant where it would add to the prestige and professionalism, but in a average restuarant I’m totally fine with the waiter having a look at the tablet before answering a question about the menu.

Second, you have to be a salesman. You need to be able to know how to convince people to buy something that they may not have considered buying when they walked through the door, and you have to know that they will not only thank you for it in the end, but financially reward you for it.

I guess being annoying is a skill. But I absolutly fucking hate when people do that. The job is to take the order, not suggest one.

Again, outside of super-fancy restaurants, I’d think that’s actually quite inappropriate.

Third, you have to be cool under pressure. […] You’ll also be talked down to by customers, yelled at by cooks, burned by hot plates, sexually harassed by both customers and coworkers

So the skill to cope with a shitty work environment. I’m not trying to diminish that, it’s a serious skill. But also one that is require in almost every job these days. But I guess it’s particularly important in the gastronomie, I give you that one.

Fourth, you need to be able to get along with everyone, or at least be such a convincing liar that Ted Bundy would be impressed with your sociopathic people skills. […]

Disagree.

The entire fake-friendly act with a fake-smile is a very annoying American thing. Your job is to take the order and bring the food. After that I really don’t want to hear anything else but “Enjoy your meal” and “Was everything alright?”. Talkative waiters are the worst.