I’m old Gregg

Hear me out, the egg one but balanced with more brown sugar than white. It’s very similar to the Tate’s brand chocolate chip cookies.

If we’re talking strictly food items, my aunt sucking on hard candies. Bonus torture points for doing so while smoking in a car with only my window hardly cracked (because that’s all that was allowed) and being constantly on/off the accelerator without any reason the whole car ride. I cannot express how trapped I felt in that car sometimes…

That or people sucking goddamn marrow out of goddamn bones.

Put some respek on her name!

I have no idea what I mean but your reply made me realize I really want raisin jam to be a thing…

And a complementary turkey baster, too!

Oooh gay kill me harder daddy

What happened to his crusty ass since the bout of freezing anyway? GOP shove him in a corner out of view?

Scheiße

Wait, if you didn’t have her number how else were you gonna ask her out than in person??

There’s a couple of science-based social groups (usually ‘skeptics’ is in the name, a la Skeptics Society) where I live (SLC) so might be a very good place to start recruiting ‘sales’ people in your own areas…

1. Yogurt (strawberry) and granola
2. Beef pot pie (frozen)
3. Beer

*Snack: also beer

Honestly not a bad set for some foot shots. Slightly damp sand squishing between the little piggy’s, and all that…

Hear me out: toothpick drawer.

Eat some corn on the cob? Open up the toothpick drawer and get those cracks clean!

Need to test the cake is done? Open up the toothpick drawer and stab away!

Toothpick drawer™️

Excuse me, are you me?! Being an uninteresting introvert and guilty for it is my spirit animal anyway…

Lt. Dangle, your legs!!!

I’m not usually a soggy food fan, but Rice Chex are an absolute delight when they have time to marinate in the milk for a few 🤌

I would love to stop seeing posts in other languages pop up in my feed constantly - just some type of feature to help organize the languages of each instance a bit better.

Don’t be afraid to block instances if you would like to see less politics and doom scrolling. I listen to NPR and read my local news, so I don’t need to see all that here as well. I just want gratuitous memes and good convos about nothing important with internet strangers.