When I was 6, I was in a boating accident.

My family and I were waterskiing and camping off this little island on the lake. We did it all the time, since my uncle had a speedboat.

My mom was about to take her turn, and I was sitting in the boat behind my uncles seat, facing the back to watch her ski. When my uncle tried to start the boat, it faltered. Made a rut-rut-rut noise but wouldn’t start. After try three or four, I smelled something awful, and pinched my nose. The last thing I remember is my mom asking me if I smelled something bad, and I nodded.

The engine exploded into a ball of fire and engulfed me.

The next thing I know, I’m under water and bobbing to the surface (wear your life-vests, kids). My mom is screaming and my cousin is swimming to me and drags me to shore. My uncle (just outside the blast radius) had reached into the fire to grab me and thrown me into the water.

I was… calm. I felt nothing. We had to hail a passing boat to take us off the island to get to a hospital. I remember my mom asking me if I hurt, and shaking my head.

If i looked at my arms and legs and saw what I looked like at that point, I can’t remember at all, but I was covered in third-degree burns. I was in the hospital for a while, and then was in a wheelchair for a bit while my legs were wrapped. I had to have water therapy for my burns. I do remember the oblong, black boils that developed over my burns in the months that followed. For a long period of time, I couldn’t be in the sun, and had to wear a bonnet when I went to school.

My skin healed beautifully though. I’ve only got one long-lasting scar from it on my shoulder. The doctor said that my uncle throwing me into the cold lake water is what most-likely saved my skin from being permanently damaged. I’m sure being 6 years old helped immensely, too.

Having worked on ze ambulance when I was younger, here are a few favorites:

The guy who lit his wheelchair on fire and rode it across his house to unlock the front door.

The navy boxer who came up swinging after being cardioverted.

The two teen brothers that tried stabbing each other to death over how to divide up some puppies.

The woman who stabbed her boyfriend 15 times (including one in the scrotum) for refusing to take her to the movies the night before.

The woman being arrested who offered us all the money in her purse (probably close to $30) to “wreck the ambulance so she could escape in the confusion.”