• Kimdracula@sh.itjust.works
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    5 months ago

    Changing your environment is a middle class luxury, do you think poor people have the luxury of “start over again” moving and stuff, that bs is from your Hollywood movies.

    I live with my family in a middle size apartment ffs. There’s no start over. There’s no ✨ change your environment ✨ I’m unemployed and poor. And that won’t change even if I had a job.

    • Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      It would certainly help. “Change your environment” doesn’t necessarily mean “move”. Getting a job counts. Surrounding yourself with people who have healthy thought patterns counts. Redecorating your room counts.

      • Kimdracula@sh.itjust.works
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        5 months ago

        Healthy thoughts? So apparently I’m supposed to surround myself with gay people or something? Because everyone screws everyone. I don’t see that as unhealthy, is just reality

        • Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          I haven’t been screwed over by someone in literal years, because I surround myself with people who don’t do that. Again, if you think “everyone” does something, that’s likely not true; it’s only a reflection of the people you see daily. “It’s just reality” is a thought-terminating cliche that is preventing you from improving your environment.

          • Kimdracula@sh.itjust.works
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            5 months ago

            You trying to gaslight me won’t change my reality. Again, I barely interact with everyone, right now I’m being screwed by people that I don’t know yet I’m forced to talk to, don’t fucking lie to me. You’re not living my life, stop talking in dumb guru lines, improving your environment isn’t a thing.

            • Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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              5 months ago

              I’d argue my tone has been at least 50% technical rather than pure guru nonsense, but fine, how about I switch to something more direct. Get off your ass and stop complaining about your life without making any effort to fix it. You want to be happy? You want the people that you know to treat you with respect? Drop the ones who don’t, and find ones who do! I’m not lying, I’m not gaslighting, and I’m not trying to mislead you. What possible incentive would I have to do that? Do you think everyone goes around being miserable 100% of the time? No, because we have chosen to identify and fix the problems in our lives (internal and external– that’s why I keep bringing up environments), so that we can enjoy the lives we’re making. You owe it to yourself to do the same.

              Obviously I don’t know much about your life, that’s why I’m trying to get you to understand how to fix it yourself. I can’t do shit, I’m just trying to motivate you to do something. If you do have someone in your life that you value and trust, you should ask them for advice, but until you do, this is the best you’re gonna get.

              • Kimdracula@sh.itjust.works
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                5 months ago

                You ain’t doing shit that’s right, you feel important or something? Life has fucked me over and over. So I’m done, you’re a shitty motivator and another one who thinks that everyone has the same opportunities “get off your ass” isn’t a thing. There’s different realities, some people are lucky and get everything and fuck themselves, others don’t. Is not their fault, it’s not my fault.

                • Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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                  5 months ago

                  You feel important or something?

                  You think I’m doing this as some sort of power trip? What a twisted view of reality. I’m doing this because I want to help, for some reason.

                  You’re a shitty motivator

                  Well, you did ask me to change techniques. Ultimately I can’t force you to be motivated. Anyone you talk to on this site is throwing shit at a wall to see if it sticks. If you want tailored advice, talk to someone IRL. Like I said, this is the best the internet can do for you without knowing more about who you are.

                  Listen, I never said it was your fault. Most people aren’t where they are because it’s their fault. Not rich people, not poor people, and probably not you or me. Some people are born into a life full of challenges, and some are born with a bulldozer that can ram through any issues they face. That doesn’t mean that you should just lay down in the road and give up, does it? Like I said, you do have some control over your circumstances. Are you going to suddenly become Bezos? No. But you can change your environment. You can make an effort to do things that you care about, instead of giving up. You can ask for help if you need to rest, because you can’t make a massive effort every day indefinitely. Relatedly, setting up your environment so that you don’t have to make a massive effort to make the choices that you know are good for yourself is the whole reason I keep bringing it up.