Deep inside I wish all of you say “no, it wasn’t” so I can cope with the fact I’ll die alone more peacefully… But I guess I can’t control y’all, so be honest or whatever.

    • the post of tom joad@sh.itjust.works
      0·
      12 days ago

      I dunno what dating experience you have, or even if everyone does this. Only speaking to my own experience, i used to calculate whether i was being a good mate or whether i was being taken advantage, that kind of thinking. When i met my partner all that stuff disappeared.

      I glossed over the “get head right” stage but that was the most important bit for me, and may be where you are in life if you follow my path.

      I am and have always been a romantic, really wanted to be with someone. Gave up even looking for dates and focused on my own head and life. Went to the gym, got a little project to do, (you know, that pat shit everyone says to do like it’s fucking easy.)

      It just happened to be something i was capable of in that moment. I i discovered them what it means when ppl say exercise is good for your brain. And then, while i was busy minding my business i got chased down and married by someone who saw more in me than i see in myself.

      I’m definitely not special in any way, solid 6/10. That means it can happen to you even tho it sounds like I’m blowing smoke up your ass.

      Anyway i don’t know how to finish this, but i really empathize with where you are cuz i was there too. i just wanna extend the belief to you that you can get here, you really can.

      • Platypus@lemmings.worldOP
        0·
        12 days ago

        Here’s the thing. I already went to the gym long ago and had a shitty job (all my jobs will be shitty, I’m dumb, uneducated and poor) I quit both. I couldn’t take it anymore and it’s been years since then. That’s just not me, it depresses me.